Speaking candidly with her mother Blythe Danner for the goop podcast in an episode titled, “Gwyneth x Blythe: On Mothers and Daughters,” Paltrow recalled experiencing postpartum depression after welcoming her second child with ex-husband Chris Martin.
“I think [it] was really shocking to me because I never thought that I would be a person who got post-natal depression,” the actress, 45, admitted.
Paltrow also revealed she was even more taken aback because of her first pregnancy with daughter Apple, now 13. “I was so euphoric when Apple was born, and I assumed it would happen with Mosey and it just … it took a while. I really went into a dark place,” the mother of two said.
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Paltrow, who is now engaged to producer Brad Falchuk, previously detailed her battle with postpartum depression in 2015.
“Luckily, [my case] was low grade enough that I didn’t have to be hospitalized, but it’s a very debilitating thing, and I think there’s so much shame around it and there shouldn’t be,” she told Entertainment Tonight.
“It’s something that happens, it’s something that befalls many women after they have a baby, and for me, it ended up being a wonderful opportunity to explore some underlying issues that I think the depression kind of brought out,” she said.
“I try to wrap [my head around] the whole thing, and even at the time, it was very difficult to go through, that it was happening. It was in my life for a reason and I tried to use that opportunity to try to really get in there and heal some stuff.”
Also in 2011, Paltrow called herself a “zombie” after Moses’ birth.
“I felt like a zombie. I couldn’t access my heart. I couldn’t access my emotions. I couldn’t connect,” she told Good Housekeeping. “It was terrible, it was the exact opposite of what had happened when Apple was born. With her, I was on cloud nine. I couldn’t believe it wasn’t the same. I just thought it meant I was a terrible mother and a terrible person.”
In fact, ex Martin was the first to recognize her postpartum depression symptoms.
“About four months into it, Chris came to me and said, ‘Something’s wrong. Something’s wrong.’ I kept saying, ‘No, no, I’m fine.’ But Chris identified it, and that sort of burst the bubble,” Paltrow said.
“I thought postpartum depression meant you were sobbing every single day and incapable of looking after a child. But there are different shades of it and depths of it, which is why I think it’s so important for women to talk about it. It was a trying time. I felt like a failure.”